Last night was the first meeting of The Lighthouse bereavement support group at Decatur County Memorial Hospital.

The Lighthouse will hold meetings on the third Thursday of each month for anyone who is struggling with the weight of loved one’s passing.

The companioning concept that will be used in the meetings, DCMH director of social services Lori Hunter said, is based on the work of Dr. Alan Wolfelt. Wolfelt has a center for loss located in Colorado and gives lectures and seminars nationwide on the complex subject of grief.

Decatur County has not had a group of this kind until now. Just because it has not been here, Hunter said, does not mean there has been no need. Many people in the community carry the burden of loss, and The Lighthouse will strive to give them support to carry them through.

The materials for this new program were made possible by a grant from the Hospital Foundation, and director David Fry ordinarily makes a point of attending the first meeting of grant-funded events. This time, however, he has more personal reasons to attend. His family has suffered a variety of losses in the past 10 years, most recently the passing of his mother in January. He knows first hand the complexity of grief and how invaluable support can be.

Much of the time, Fry said, people have to find their own way through difficult times. Still, he is excited about the creation of a local support system.

Whether it is feelings of loneliness or common, everyday chores that become overwhelming, The Lighthouse is intended to be a place where those working through the process of grief can come together and lead one another through.

“You can tell those who have been through it,” Fry said.

Often, he noted, people are uncomfortable with those who are grieving and will shy away, not knowing what to say. It is also typical for sensitivity to wilt with the flowers and cards that arrive in the days after a funeral. He said the best description of grief he has heard is that it is shaped like a U. Many times, people see loss in the same way they see a surgery, where the moment it is over, the healing begins. Grief is not like that. It is a long process of realizing the depth of the impact the loss has on one’s life and learning to cope with each task and each event in a new way, he said.

As The Lighthouse gathered yesterday evening, Hunter said, they set ground rules and expectations, creating a structure for the meetings. Still, newcomers will always be welcome, as those who do not need support today may need it tomorrow.

The meetings will take place in conference room D at Decatur County Memorial Hospital at 6 p.m. the third Thursday of each month. Signs will be posted to lead to the location, Hunter assured.